You’ll Never Believe What Can Make You Fall in Love

Some people fall in love because of someone’s looks, or how someone makes them feel. Many people say they fall in love at first sight, but this isn’t exactly what they were talking about. According to scientists, eye contact can make you fall in love.

A research study dating back to 1989 conducted by psychologist Arthur Aron proves this fact. He made people sit opposite one another, staring into each other’s eyes and asking a series of questions. They were asked to stare into each other’s eyes for four minutes while those questions were being asked. So what happened after the study? After few days, one of those couples got married and invited the entire crew who participated in the experiment.

This study has been getting a lot of attention the last few years, ever since the NYT covered it in its newspaper along with the “36 Questions that Lead to Love.” A few examples include “What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?”, “If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.” , “Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.”, and “Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.”

Additional research confirms that eye contact is a dominant stimulator of love and affection. Direct eye contact increases the production of a chemical called phenylethylamine. This has been dubbed the “happy hormone”, and influences the production of dopamine and serotonin. How does this happen?

A Japanese study indicates that eye contact actually makes the brain activity between two people start to sync up…which is why when you’re looking deeply into someone’s eyes you start to feel like you’re getting “lost”. 90 people were paired up had their brain activity scanned using an MRI. The study found that people coordinated their blinking and excited part of the brain that impacts inhibition. The outcome indicates that a related eye contact coerces two people into a particular hooked up system.

So, if you want the secret to long-lasting love, or to get someone to fall in love with you, get them to look deeply into your eyes…and hold it. This will make you feel closer than ever, and fall in love all over again (or for the first time!)

29 thoughts on “You’ll Never Believe What Can Make You Fall in Love

  • June 6, 2019 at 12:07 am
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    I am in a relationship almost 3 months, and I never heard of this staring in the eyes. My love is a gentleman like no man I have ever met. We connect unlike any Male I have ever known. We are connected through, spiritual, emotional, mind, body, and soul. We have been together without sex, and it’s been great. We are great friends and lovers, without making love.. So when we do make love it will only be better. Appreciation, Respect, and Communication with your spouse or significant other makes the relationship fun and loving💖

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  • June 6, 2019 at 12:06 am
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    This works, I am in a relationship almost 3 months, and I never heard of this staring in the eyes. My love is a gentleman like no man I have ever met. We connect unlike any Male I have ever known. We are connected through, spiritual, emotional, mind, body, and soul. We have been together without sex, and it’s been great. We are great friends and lovers, without making love.. So when we do make love it will only be better. Appreciation, Respect, and Communication with your spouse or significant other makes the relationship fun and loving💖

    Reply
  • May 15, 2019 at 9:30 am
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    I met my boyfriend 18 yrs. ago n were still together n now were talking about getting married n getting a house together. Hes strictly honest with me as i with him. N we do alot of things together. Im 67 n hes 75 but he still has it going on n i deeply love him like he loves me. Hes my soul mate n im his. Forever love.

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  • March 10, 2019 at 4:59 am
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    back in 1983.. met the boy next door who had the most mezmerizing blue eyes. We used to stare into each others eyes for long gazes. He wound up being my 1st true love however I was only 14. here it is 34 years later and we just reunited 6 months ago! I believe it to be true! thanks for posting this!

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  • February 1, 2019 at 11:40 pm
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    Comments were to negative for my taste and state of being, presently.

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  • January 10, 2019 at 12:37 pm
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    I stare into my girlfriends eyes all the time and at first she would say what are you looking at, or what? But, she quickly started to say she loves me within one month of dating when she said she has only said that to one other man and she is 47 years old. Ohh, and she is hot!! 🙂 Lol We are already talking about a life together after only a little over two months. I am going to talk to her about Arthur Aron’s work.

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    • March 22, 2019 at 4:10 pm
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      I did this with boyfriend and yes this is true

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      • April 5, 2019 at 11:27 pm
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        I met my girlfriend only two weeks ago and that’s the first thing I noticed about her,her piercing blue eyes I can stare at her for hours she just does it for me I love her eyes and only after a weeks time maybe a little less did I know that I love her so I would have to agree her eyes are the window to her soul..

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    • May 16, 2019 at 12:29 am
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      Beware the man who keeps his eyes shut during sex.

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  • July 24, 2018 at 11:42 am
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    If you think about it, it can be pretty dangerous to just fall in love with sight, ignoring all the cringy things really going on with the person. Be careful, guys.

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    • March 27, 2019 at 6:14 pm
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      My ex fell for me so I thought. He only did it because his true love was my BFF(who’s no longer part of my friendship group. I really thought he loved me but he never wanted to stay by my side physically. My dad took him to the mall and he escaped every few minutes. I knew I was being cheated on but I didn’t think anything of it because he acted so innocent so the stupid person I was back then stayed with him until I got a phone call from him saying that there was someone else he loved and we ended our year and a half relationship that day😢

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      • April 5, 2019 at 8:33 am
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        Thats why i just ended my relationship. Pretty much told me “Hey i wanna do other people” so despite everything i stayed because i did love him. Now we dont talk at all. He’s gone at my behest. Was the right choice though.

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  • July 12, 2018 at 7:41 pm
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    Everyone in my group makes fun of me for liking this guy so quickly, but love just works like that.

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  • June 22, 2018 at 3:46 pm
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    These are just weak! And they’re confusing it with just wanting sex. Like my ex-husband would be in love with the whore he left me for.

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    • March 25, 2019 at 8:09 am
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      Ik the feeling hun trust me. It hurts my ex I was with for 4 yrs she cheated on me with my best friend. Like I walked in on them

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  • June 3, 2018 at 8:09 pm
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    This all must be lies! It cannot be possible! People just fall for looks. It’s all superficial!

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    • April 3, 2019 at 11:30 am
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      Not true I fall in love with the man not the appearance . take my husband for example everyone says I can do so much better and I’m too attractive to be with him and when I met him I probably thought this was true too. Fast forward a few years and we are married happier then ever and I think he’s the most handsome man I’ve ever met. Once you fall in love with the person the looks fall in line as well.

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  • May 11, 2018 at 10:56 pm
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    my hubby and i stare deeply into eachothers eyes and i can tell were connected its almost like i can read his thoughts and he can read mine GOD is GOOD

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    • March 7, 2019 at 9:25 pm
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      All right, ok, I’ll tell you, same here, in 1979, my boss sold the shop and I had to move back to Santa Rosa, to stay with my Mom and look for a job. My little sister helped me find one, night shift, and it didn’t take long, Brian found out I just got hired, and UT was short and sweet, the ” connection, into the eyes. And that was it, a few dates, and wham bam, thank you maam’. I was 30, and he was still 20. His Mom was the only one concerned, we weren’t. I felt the feeling that, I could crawl inside him and become part if him, no other feeling like THAT, had ever been experienced, by either myself or Brian. 21 years, we were married, had our daughter, 9 years into our marriage, but, unfortunately, Bri got all fat and happy, and ignored me, so, I answered the door one day, it was for Him, “Bri, there’s someone @ the door for you,” it was divorce papers. Poor thing. I still remember the look on his face. But, he was too fat for sex or much else anymore, just shook my head, why am I bothering with this. The entire feeling I had had , @the beginning, when I first met him, was gone. That’s my story.

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    • June 18, 2019 at 7:38 am
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      This is a real connection process..3yrs & 11 mo.. and this man and I still stare…smiling!! No words.. thoughts connecting…you feel a deep energy, butterflies..heart racing…. it’s like a drug

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  • May 10, 2018 at 1:14 am
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    Dont just start staring into someones eyes like this without them knowing or they’re going to be real creeped out!!!!!!!

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  • May 10, 2018 at 1:29 pm
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    someone should show this to the Donald and Melania lol

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    • March 31, 2019 at 5:02 pm
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      Your projecting !! your brain lacks content

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  • May 10, 2018 at 2:09 am
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    Don’t you have to actually like the person first? Like do you think anyone can do this at all and they’ll jsut fall i love?

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    • February 23, 2019 at 9:51 pm
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      I agree with you. If I dont like the guy or his eyes, I would avoid eye contact as much as possible

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  • May 9, 2018 at 11:21 am
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    this makes total sense!!! read the questions they asked and its basically just you getting to know the other person while lookin n their eyes. im trying it on my next date lol

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    • August 24, 2018 at 6:34 am
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      This short blog piece doesn’t really explain Arthur Aron’s work. His original intent was to find a way for people to quickly fall in love so that he would have easier access to test subjects for his main work. He developed the process that the NTY article refers to as the 36 Questions that Lead to Love. The questions as well as the entire activity is very specifically designed. Partners alternate reading the question and both answer. They eventually get much more personal, but along the way there are questions intended to force the pair to see commonalities between them (Name three things you and your partner seem to have in common) and to identify positive traits in the other person. After the questions are finished the pair stare into each other’s eyes for four minutes. At first it is frightening but after the first minute or so you start to really see them and by the 4th minute you sense a deep connection with them and can feel them seeing you as well.

      I was on a dating site for a while and one of the women I was chatting with agreed to try this on our first date. It works. Yes, you have to be willing to let it work and all that, but 6 months later we have a wonderful, strong relationship filled with the honesty that neither of us had in our previous marriage, and right out of the gate our first dates felt more like spending time with someone we had known for a while, not just a few weeks.

      Reply

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