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The internet brought a variety of things together, but one thing you might not have thought of is how it changed the dating world. A lot of us are probably married, but for anyone who is single these days, we’re all familiar with online dating. And perhaps we may have dabbled into long-distance relationships. While some people have been in many long-distance relationships, some may be skeptical as to whether they can really work. And we don’t blame you.
Relationships – specifically new relationships – affect us on a deep emotional level. If you are used to dating someone who’s near you and be physically around you on a daily basis, you might not think long distance relationships work. Especially since it can take days or a few months before you get to see them again. But part of the process of actually making an LDR work is embracing that fact. Accept that some days you may cuddle up against your partners dirty shirt or pillow. Corny as it is, if you care deeply about your partner you’ll find a way to make it work.
If you are relatively new to it or you are dipping back into LDRs, the key to making an LDR work is to always have a plan with your partner. If you are separated for several months, you’re going to need something to keep each other motivated. So saying things like “We’ll be together for New Years,” or, “I’ll see you at Easter,” or, “We’ll go on a vacation together soon,” are all things that can inspire hope and give people the opportunity to look forward to something. After all, there’s slim chance a relationship will work if it’s entirely online and you never see each other. There needs to be some physical connection at some point in time or it’ll fizzle out.
On that note as well, it’s important to keep in mind that not all LDRs are going to work indefinitely. As mentioned above, a purely online LDR is not going to work. People need some level of physical connection and that’s not something that can be achieved by FaceTiming or through Skype calls and “text hugs”. If neither one of you or your partner is going to relocate to the other, then there’s no real point of holding out and meeting one another briefly. LDRs can work if the only strain on the relationship is that you’ll have to be away for a certain period of time. Examples are studying or working abroad while your partner is working somewhere else.
In those kinds of situations, if your partner is worth it, put some extra effort to make it work. Some tactics to consider are to be set daily guidelines. Examples are texting the other when you wake up and hopping on a video chat with them during the night. Even if it’s for a few minutes. Another thing to keep in mind is that these relationships will face completely different issues and challenges than a typical relationship would. In short, whether they work is really up to each other emotional fortitude as a lot of these problems you’ll face are on a mental and emotional level deeper than any other typical relationship would get to in the beginning. It can be tough, but they can work if you are willing to grow and strengthen up emotionally.